Elegance in 10 Steps



One of the key steps to being elegant is making the most of your feminine style. This is not trashy but is to make the most of your feminine persona, that is still in keeping with your good taste and unique personality.


Let’s get into the 10 keys to making the most of your feminine style.



Step 1  

To be Elegant you must have an allure of elegance


This allure exudes femininity yet remains tasteful. This happens naturally when you show self-confidence and allow the aura of who you are to be revealed in the twinkle of your eyes, in your quiet way of speaking, the elegant way you sit and walk, and in the movement of your arms. The aim is to create a graceful presence.


To do this, think ‘graceful’ when you move, when you speak, when you reach for something and soon it will become a habit. Be a lady and think about poise and balance.



Step 2  

To be Elegant you must have good manners


By good manners, I’m not referring to the etiquette of fine dining or introductions, although knowing those things can certainly help in the right situation. I’m talking about every day manners like chewing with your mouth closed, taking small bites of food and sips of drink. Laughing delicately and not with a loud raucous guffaw. 


Chic and elegant women are charming and strive to speak correctly with poise and have impeccable manners.



Step 3  

To be Elegant you must have an air of mystery


Elegant women don’t tell all their secrets. They don’t wear their heart on their sleeve and neither do they share confidences that have been entrusted to them.


Cultivate an air of mystique. This can only be acquired by keeping some things private, especially with casual acquaintances. 


In conversations, rather than sharing information about yourself, speak instead of a topic that is of mutual interest. Cultivate an interesting life with books, education and travel and you will always have a wealth of topics to discuss.


And never, ever report personal health and relationship issues with anyone except the closest to you.


Aim to keep some things private and let people wonder about you.



Step 4  

Elegant women wear lingerie, not underwear


Men wear underwear, women wear lingerie. Elegant women love the feel of beautiful lingerie on their skin. Whether it is fine cotton, lace, silk or satin, it is worn as a constant reminder of being a soft, feminine lady.


Good lingerie is expensive and should make you feel pampered and special.


It is a defining aspect of feminine allure. Have some fun, feel wonderful with the secret elegance that is beneath your clothing.



Step 5  

Elegant women always wear a fragrance


Perfume is part of being well dressed and is as much a finishing touch as putting on the right piece of jewellery. Your fragrance may vary from night to day, with a lighter version of your signature perfume for day (eau de toilette) and the fuller version for evening (eau de parfum). You may also like to change your perfume according to the seasons with perhaps a lighter floral aroma for summer and something warmer for winter. 


Some of you may prefer to use essential oils as opposed to manufactured perfumes and to keep them off your skin, but rather have the perfume on a tissue or cotton ball under your clothing.


A woman communicates her femininity by the faint, beautiful aroma she leaves behind.


It is a luxurious extravagance and some of the best are the French perfumes, which have a long tradition and lasting reputation, of being outstanding. 



Step 6  

Elegant women always include touches of femininity


Whether it is a corporate suit, a uniform or what you wear at home, always include small accessories which remind you and those around you, of your innate beauty and feminine elegance. It may be a strand of pearls, the right piece of jewellery, a ribbon, a scarf or something else. 


Even if you are wearing jeans, boots and a sweater you can still add a reminding touch of your femininity. Adding heels, lifting your hair, wearing clean, pressed clothes and making an effort to be attractive will all enhance your feminine allure.


To be Elegant is to have Personal Elegance.


In a sea of sameness, allow your personal style to speak.



Step 7  

Dress Impeccably – Make the effort to be your best


What does your look say about your personal style? Your hair and clothes should represent your elegant and chic personality. 


Does your hair style change over time? Do you change your hairdresser?


By changing your cut, color and style to be more chic and modern, you will often feel like a new person. If you have a style that you have developed into something that is uniquely suited to you and is very sharp, then stick with

it. However, if it is looking tired, take a trip to a different hairdresser and see what they can do for you.


Do your clothes fit properly? Do you like them?


How you wear your clothes, comes from how you feel inside. Your posture and attitude can make an expensively dressed woman appear ordinary, and a 

budget dressed woman look sensational. Your inner magic, a spring in your step and a head held high will make your clothes look their best. None of us get it right all the time but let’s head in the direction we want to be going.


Stop and take a personal inventory. How is your hair? How is your summer style? Winter style? Casual style? Is it time to create a personal makeover?



Step 8  

Carry Yourself Well


Remember, you are strong enough and courageous enough to be yourself at all times. Be different from others, trust in yourself, stand up and stand out.


Don’t wait all your life to see that you had it going on for you, all along.


Have you ever looked back at old photos and seen yourself in a new light?


Have you said, “Wow! I looked really good in that. I thought I looked fat/awful/….”


I can’t give you the right attitude, you will have to find it within yourself, but it’s there. When you carry yourself well, you express confidence, which in turn makes you feel more confident. Pretending can make it real, step by step. Create a new habit for a new way of seeing yourself.



Step 9  

Elegance is Appropriateness


To be beautifully expressed as Elegant in a large city, will be very different than if you live in a small rural town. Your style will also be modulated according to your age, your society and culture. There is no ‘one size fits all’

prescription for being chic and elegant. That is why you cannot buy it off a shelf and why it is so valued. An elegant woman (or man) stands out in a crowd of mediocrity and sameness. 


Your challenge, like us all when aiming to be more elegant, is to develop your elegant life within the boundary of appropriateness for you.


To look your best, act your best and always be a lady, takes time and effort.


It also needs to not make others feel uncomfortable by looking overdressed, or inappropriate for where you live and work. Take it up a notch, but don’t leap so far you overstep the mark and become a showcase.



Step 10  

The Company You Keep


This doesn’t need too much explanation. It is said that if you look at the 5 people you spend the most time with, you will see how others will perceive you. We become like the people we spend most of our time with. Expand your interests and friends if you wish to find other like-minded friends.





In the program Living with Elegance, there are dozens of videos, that teach ways to grow in your journey of gaining more elegance and style. It is available at the top of the website under: Course


To your life in elegance,